" She took a deep breath. "Am I perfect for you Jonathan? Do I look like your perfect woman?"The face peering back at me couldn't be real. It was the ...ind of face you see on the front of magazines. A face that was airbrushed ten times and then photo shopped twenty more times.Her skin was the color of marble and it was flawless. It was nothing but an endless expanse of unbroken pale flesh. Her hair was longer, and seemed thicker, and seemed to flow fluidly behind her. Her breasts seemed bigger. I’ve never got on with girls. I can’t stand the superficial bollocks girls talk about and the bitchiness. I do have girl friends. We hang out, I feign interest in what colour lipstick they’ve bought or the new miracle moisturiser that’s going to change their life, but I don’t drink gin and attend love island viewing parties.My cliched gay best friend Tom isn’t really a cliché either. He watches football with me while we devour a twenty-four box of Stella. When City play United, we sit on. " Not good enough," I said as my plan formulated further in my mind. "You have to be punished for humiliating me," I said."Whhhhhhhhhat do u mean?" Abbey looked flabbergasted."You have to make it up to me," I said, "or I just leave right now and tell mom and Aunt Mary what happened!" Ok, ok, ok" she said cutting me off as I headed for the door, she closed the door and locked it. "What do you want from me?" she asked."Well' I said, "I know that you have had boy friends so I figure you must know. "Nothing. Figures...I should just---" But before Mark could finish his thought he heard Austin in the kitchen screaming. At least he thought it was Austin because her voice seemed to have changed. It was more nasal and high pitched. As Mark finally got into the kitchen what he saw was Austin...but it wasn't. There was Austin. She was AWESOME. At least for Mark she was awesome. She stood 5' tall as opposed to her normal 5'7''. Her long brown hair had changed into an even longer collection of.
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